We don't do porn

I recently got a nice roll-film camera and it has been a rather interesting mixture of frustration, surprise, and reward. I intend to write about this at length soon, but the latest in the series of continuing trials and tribulations of temporarily switching to old-school format was just too funny. So here goes:

Time: Sat morning, about 1p

Scene: I have just finished developed a roll of b/w film and am admiring the work and I can't wait to get this printed. So, I call CVS 1-hr photo thinking they will be able to develop the Kodak Tri-X B/W film.

Me: Hello, CVS Photo services?
CVS lady: Yes, how can we help you today?
Me: Can you make prints from negatives?
CVS: You mean you just want prints? from film developed at CVS?
Me: Um... yes and no, I have developed my own roll of film and I just wanted some prints. You make prints of any kind of film right?
CVS: (pause).. We don't make prints of pornography
Me: (flabbergasted)... (long pause).. What?! (thinking WTF!) Excuse me?
CVS: We don't make prints of pornographic or any stuff like that..
Me: (recovering somewhat and embarrassed laugh).. oh no this is quite regular pictures.. umm.. nothing dirty.. just pictures of streets and buildings.
CVS: Ok, bring them in. I will have to first take a look to see before we can develop them
(perhaps implying maybe you have some porn that you don't know yet?)
...

The conversation then continued and it was then shortly determined that despite the complete lack of pornographic, erotic, or any other kind of visually arresting, publicly unmentionable content CVS will not develop my negatives. In fact, no large store will process even the most innocuous photos taken on a Kodak Tri-X roll. All because it's not a C41 type roll. I would have to either do it myself or ask a professional photo lab. I am wondering if that specialty lab will be disappointed that it's not porn. I do have some photos of a fountain with a naked Neptune surround by mermaids. Does that count?

1 comment:

SKP50 said...

HILARIOUS!Your own dark room can be a sinister joint too!!Wait for an inspection.